in need of a word

I realized that in the last few months, really since I've been here, I haven't been taking in the Word of God in service. I've had people translate a few times for me in the earlier months, but other than that it's been a routine of going downstairs, hearing a message preached in Spanish, and heading back up to my room once it's all over. I realized that it has taken a toll on me. I am so hungry to hear and understand the Word preached.

I can practice listening in Spanish during service, but this muscle hasn’t strengthened much, especially if I don't feel like I'm being directly spoken to. I find myself thinking about other things, distracted from what Word would be helpful in my current growth as a believer. I’ve been attending church service because I’ve wanted to – each week I tell myself that I am going to be attentive in listening to the message in Spanish. But each week has proven to be the same old pattern of lacking understanding.

So, instead of attending service today, I decided to listen to biblical messages uploaded on my laptop. I also listened a preach titled, "Give up the Good for the Best" by my home church pastor (www.sphac.org). The message was about how Moses gave up his life in Egypt to heed the call of God. It was refreshing to hear Hmonglish and it felt like I was sitting next to my parents on the pew.

I am going to try harder to comprehend the messages in Spanish during service. I am also going to commit my Sundays to going online to listen to sermons. My desire is to know God through His Word, be filled with the Holy Spirit, and deepen in root. Glory to God in the Highest. Amen.